Swordfish!

My Grandfather was 94 years old when he passed away. He appreciated a good joke, cheesy wit included and was taken by a Marx Brothers movie in which a deaf mute attempts to gain entrance to a private establishment. The door keeper asks for the password, and the would-be enterer, not able to speak improvises by holding up a sword and a fish.

My grandfather enjoyed that story so much that he took on 'swordfish' as his own house's password and asked it of all (family members) who would knock on his door.

Grandpa, I say to you 'swordfish!'

A Chip Butty for a Chip Buddy

A delicious + joyful Valentine's Day to all the "foodies," "gourmands," and plain ole food lovers out there. Here's a card I made for my own home grown foodie to celebrate the day.

The Modern Couple

"I've missed our movie nights."

The Wonderful In-Between World of Chinglish

The New York Times has a brilliant article and slide show about the many wonderful phrases that at times emerge when Chinese is translated to English. Here are a few illustrations to accompany some of the very poetic results.

The Little Grass is Sleeping. Do Not Disturb It.

Slip and Fall Down Carefully

See the original sign here.

Fragrant and Hot Marxism
(outside a restaurant)

Execution In Progress
(on a Caution - Wet Floor sign)

Inventions that should be

"Check out this new heartbeat app!"

Graceful Jellies

I'll get back to stories soon... but here are a few drawings from the Monterey Bay Aquarium. Even if you don't live in CA, they have a ton of webcams that help you 'pop over' whenever you need a fix of penguin, sea otter, the kelp forrest or more!

Crime or Punishment?

I did the cartoon above for Columbia's BWOG this Sunday on 'Crime & Punishment' the book that all students read must read as part of the 'core' or general required class.

And then I did the following sketch based on the idea if there were a Crime or Punishment

board game. Retro-style to what Electronic Arts is doing and just the kind of thing for masochists & neophyte burglars.

The very talented Professor Gulati

Here's a drawing I did for Columbia's Blue & White Magazine. The article was about Sunil Gulati, who is a (very popular) lecturer in Economics at Columbia University and is President of the US Soccer Federation. The picture will be printed in the 'Mapril' Blue & White.

The Hair Iron

This is my hair. It's from Texas even though I'm from Ohio.

So I bought this. One cord, two ceramic heaters, and all anti-frizz.

This was what my hair should have looked like post-intervention.

This is how it turned out.

It's not all bad, I guess.

Next week I'm auditioning as an extra in The Lion King.

They said I was a natural.

New drawings

Last summer I was walking to work and picked up a leaf. This humble little leaf has been a wonderful source of inspiration. It is now a sad, faded little thing that I carefully keep in a cookie tin. Here's a sketch of one angle when it a freshly fallen.

I've hunted all through Central Park & have my own personal leaf-hunter in Ohio. Sadly, I've not yet found a leaf with such a beautifully ambiguous form. In the m

ean time I've been drawing trying to capture it at many different angles before it disintegrates into tine leaf-flecks. Below are a series of large scale (around 5' by 3') charcoal drawings on translucent paper. Eventually the work will go onto a light box frame. The drawing on the left is a work in progress; the two on the right are finished pieces.

Why, hello Spring...

Originally posted on Columbia University student blog.

Named in honor of FAPPAF friend who is quite familiar with the gentle art of greetings.

Mom Cat

Many thanks to Ronan, an artist from Ireland, for the following story.

A woman I have known for many years - Deborah - told me this story
when we met last week. Deborah is an American from Iowa, has long
bleach blonde hair, sells antique jewelry at markets in London, is in
her early fifties and has lived in the same flat in London for over 30
years. She had a cat that she called Mom for the last 15 years - whom
she loved and cherished dearly. Mom was very cute and gentle with red hair and was very popular.

Mom Cat

Mom recently passed away after a short illness. Deborah decided to bury Mom in her front garden which is very large. She roped in her pal John Boy to help and he came around one day to do the digging. John Boy is a big strong guy and works as a door man at a local bar. As John Boy dug the grave and Deborah prepared Mom for burial, a girl appeared unexpectedly from behind some bushes at the end of the long garden.

Mom Cat

Deborah described the girl as being somewhere in her early to md-twenties and as strikingly pretty with red hair that she wore in a pony tail. She also mentioned that the zipper to the girl's dress was undone. She wore high heels and was quite dressed up. Deborah reckoned that the girl was a prostitute and was also homeless and temporarily living behind the bushes at bottom of the garden. Deborah could see some blankets laid out and bags behind the bushes. The girl acted naturally and said "excuse me...what are you doing?" to Deborah and John Boy. Deborah said to her "Don't worry...we are just burying my cat". The girl goes "oh...how long did you have her?". Deborah replied "Fifteen years". The girl then said " She must have had a happy life with you...where did you get her?"

Mom Cat

Deborah looked at her and thought about it for a few seconds and then replied "Actually she came out of the same bushes you did..........maybe you are my cat re-incarnated." Then the girl said "wow" (like "meow") sounding just like Deborah's cat. Then Deborah noticed that the girl had the same two front teeth missing as her cat. And then without saying anything else the girl swaggered off out the gate and into the distance with her long red hair just like Mom's long red tail..........the end.

The Lion's Whiskers

The following is a fable from Ethiopia and was submitted by Azeb Worku Sibane, an actress, director and producer based in Addis Abba, Ethiopia.


There was a woman who was unhappy because her husband did not love her like before. At the beginning of their marriage he was always very nice with her-he worried a lot when she was a little bit tired, he brought her gifts, and he liked all the dishes that she prepared.

But unfortunately, after a while, he changed. He returned home late under pretext of having a drink with his friends or going to oversee the crops. When he returned from the market he didn’t bring any thing for her. He stopped eating at home, and when he did, he complained that all that she prepared was bland and badly cooked. The woman didn’t know how to change her husband back to how he was before.

She remembered that one old wise man, a “Debtera,” lived not far from their house, close to the church of Saint Michel. This wise man, knows a lot of things. He can read, write and prepare talismans. She thought that he could perhaps give her a charm that would return her husband’s attention and his affection.

The Lion's Whiskers

One morning she went to find the old debtera in his house. The old man welcomed her and listened to her story with attention. When she finished, he remained silent and then he said

“I will be glad to prepare for you a medicine which will make your
husband see you with the same eyes as before, but for the medicine you
must bring me three whiskers of a lion. But the whiskers must be
taken from a live lion and by your own hand.”

“How shall I do this, and, how can I find a lion? The women asked

- Farmers of the low lands said to me that there was a lion which often
comes to the heart of the valley, at the edge of the river.

She was worried by the idea of going down to the low lands, as they were known to be a dangerous area. Add to that, she has to pluck the whiskers of a live lion!...

“And what do I have to do to make this lion come close to me?” She asked.

The debtera answered, “I don’t know. The only thing I know is how to make magic medicines, not to tame a lion.”

The Lion's Whiskers

She went back home and she asked herself what she was going to do. She loved her husband, and she wanted him to love her as before-certainly the medicine of the debtera would be very effective. The next day she goes down to the bottom of the valley to taking meat in her basket. It was hot in the valley. When she heard the roar of the lion, she put the basket of the meat on a flat rock and ran away.

The following day, she returned to the same place and, at the first distant roar, she put down the meat in the same place. This time she did not run away, but she hid behind a tree not far from the place. She heard the lion arrive slowly; he was enormous. He shook his mane and opened a terrible mouth. He came to the meat;
he looked at everything around him with suspicion, then he started to eat. When he finished, he left in the direction from where he had come, calmly and the woman returned to her home.

The Lion's Whiskers

The third day, she went back to the low lands. She put the meat in the same place, she moved backward to the tree, but she did not hide. She remained motionless, watching for the arrival of the lion. The lion arrived. He looked at the woman, roared out and ate all the meat with a huge appetite, all while looking at her. When he finished, he started to leave, but at the end of some steps, he turned around, looked at her, then he resumed his walking and disappeared into bushes.

The Lion's Whiskers

The next day, having put down the meat, she only went away some steps. She was anxious and impatient to see the lion. He arrived, almost noiseless. He stopped in front of the meat, but did not touch it. He looked for a long time with his yellow eyes. Some times he stared at the women, sometimes at the meet, and then he began eating.

When he had finished, she made one step, then the other one. The lion lay, immovable. When she was close, he got up and the woman’s heart barely beat at all. The lion opened his mouth, but instead of roaring, he yawns, then he left as every day by turning around several times.

The following day, when she arrived at the same time, the lion was already there, asleep near the flat stone. She moved quite slowly and arrived in front of him she took a piece of meat out of her basket, which she stretched out, to him. The lion took it delicately. She sat down next to him to stroke his head. He began to hum like a big cat. She continued to give him the meat, which was in the basket, piece by piece until he became full. She began caressing him. The lion winked his eyes, and fell asleep.

The woman held out the hand towards the muzzle of the lion, and, delicately, plucked three whiskers. He grumbled weakly, moved a little, but continued to sleep. The women tightened her hand around the treasure, went away slowly and walked out of the bottom of the valley. Without returning even at her house, she went to find the old man debtera.